Wednesday, 30 July 2014

Wordy on Wednesday ~ The Pink Flamingo Saga Continues... Part VIII

Welcome to another Installment of 

Wordy on Wednesday 

[formerly known as Wordless on Wednesdays but we've got too much to say! MOL]

 The Pink Flamingo Saga continues... in Part VIII


 

Well, like Oh My Cod last weeks episode was the most bonkers thing effur to happen on the blog thus far, and then there was the revealing of my previous employment in the supurr secret Field Investigation Burrow or F.I.B. which as mew know is strictly classified, and then let's not furget Furrz, an old acquaintance lets say and not a furry furriendly one at that... overtly homicidal would be more appropriate!

Anyhoo, enough of my ramblings I bet mew're chomping at the bit to find out what happens next, so lets dive right into episode 8

For a quick recap on the all happenings thus far, click here: 

   Part I ~ Part II ~ Part III ~ Part IV  ~ Part V ~ Part VI Part VII
 

>^.^<


Snowie screamed again as the sky bubbled and boiled above, lightning cracked and the thunder boomed.

I jumped back, as the vicious tongue thrashed around and made another attempt to grab me.

The Pink Menace was still on the ground, quivering and sobbing, and generally being a gibbering wreck and that's when it happened.


>^.^<


 "And ACTION!"



The Pesky Pink Varmint, who was still gibbering in a pile of guano, neffur saw it coming.

Furrz the Ferocious was real, real angry as his tongue connected with the Pink varmints neck. The lethal pincers grasped tight in a deadly choke hold.

[I don't know fur sure, but I would say the pile of poop grew considerably larger at this point]




The Pink Menace was too terrified to even scream as Furrz reached out to grab him tightly in his deadly spindly clawed mitt.

"So Viddairs, vhat vill you do now I have your new buddy?" Furrz goaded maliciously his accent almost too much now. "Shall I do the same thing as I did to your last buddy, Agent MacSquirrel?"

I could feel the rage suddenly fizzing through my veins as I remembered what he did to my last partner, P.K. MacSquirrel.  He stuck those long pointy tubular claws right in him and sucked him dry, right there in front of me and I couldn't do a thing to stop it.   I had neffur felt so powerless in all my life.

I took a long deep breath, not wishing a hideous end like that on anyone, not even the Pesky Pink Menace.

"Furrz, let him go," I said determinedly, stepping forward confidently. "This is between me and mew."

"I'm hungry, and this morsel vill be a nice little appetizer!" Furrz sneered unpleasantly. "Before I get to the main course of Agent Viddairs."

"Mew really want to know what happened to your brother Mattee Ballz?" I said, my tone was ice cold. Now I had this crazy unhinged aliens attention I continued. "Mattee is very much alive and well, in fact he's our local postman and has been effur since mew left him when mew retreated like a big girls blouse, mew flea-bitten coward."

"Lies!" screamed Furrz. "You are full of lies, I saw you keel him!"

"Keel him, there are no boats here, we're fifty miles inland... oh kill him! No, mew didn't see that at all. Mew saw a huge explosion as the trans-dimensional vortex closed, he was stranded here," I said furry matter of factly. "In fact he always thought mew were a two bit raving loony dictator and was more than happy to finally be away from your total tyrannical insanity of trying to take over the universe, like all the time."

"More lies, every time you open your catty mouth lies come tumbling out!" he yelled venomously as his grip clenched tighter around the Pink Flamingo.

"Look Furzz, face it, no-one likes mew, not even your own furmilly of supurr hairy ballz," I said evenly. "Your brother has neffur been happier since he inadvertently got reassigned here."

"LIES!" Furrz screeched insanely his eyes bulging as his evil spindly mitt began to squeeze the breath out of the Pink Varmint.  He lifted his free mitt to plunge the tubey talons into the soft squidgy pinkness and suck it dry, brains and all.  

The Pink Flamingo finally found his voice and wailed as the supurr sharp pointy instruments of death punctured his body.

I was transfixed momentarily, and was just about to spring on that life-sucker, all claws blazing and go atomically ballistic, when suddenly there was a movement that caught my eye, but before I could do anything else this happened.




Furrz the Ferocious dropped the Pesky Pink Menace faster than mew could say, 

'Blaaaahhhh mew taste flipping awful!' 

"Arrrrrrrghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" he shrieked. "What vile disgusting trickery is this?"

I looked at him, my expression rather perplexed as I had no idea what the flip he was on about. I gave a half shrug but before I could answer furry strange things started to happen to him.

[Mew can watch the video now!]

Furrz screamed and howled, writhing as his face swelled and puffed up in a rather disconcerting manner, his tongue swelling and doing all sorts of really unpleasant things.

I backed away, thinking the evil one was going to burst and that's when I saw Smoochie.




Smoochie had silently somersaulted onto the lawn and rolled over with expert agility, with two pom pom grenades, one in each paw and their fuses lit.  He tossed them one after the other straight at Furrz who was too preoccupied with the intense allergic reaction from hell to notice.

"Chew on those mew mutant muther sucker!" he hollered as cool as cucumber.





The grenades headed straight fur Furrz.

"Effuryone duck and cover!" I yelled above all the noise that was still raging around us.


Furrz's last words were. "Vhy the heck did that pink thing taste so baaaaaad?"

And then I realized, the Pesky Pink Varmint was deadly toxic even to mutant brain sucking alien furrballz. His artificial colours and additives had saved him from being slurped to death.



 

 **KAAAAAAAA-BOOOOOOOOOM**

[This needs no further explanation, apart from there were bits of Furrz flotsam and jetsam blasted around the garden - the P.A. will not be impressed]




 The explosion was supurr intense and fur the second time that day we were all scattered around the garden.

I lay winded on my back [again]. But I managed to call out, "Effuryone ok?"

Smoochie answered first. "Sure thing Viddairs!"

"Me too," Snowie called from behind the mill wheels. "Amber is still unconscious though!"

 "I'm ok too," the Pesky Pink Varmint replied almost gratefully crawling away from the burning singed patch of lawn, that had been Furrz only moments ago.




But before I could answer anyone, the sky started to look rather deadly, the angry red billowing clouds filled with white hot flashes of lightning and were getting more erratic by the moment.  The trans-dimensional vortex was becoming unstable and I shouted as much.

"The trans-dimensional vortex is becoming unstable!" I yelled.

"Oh my cat!" screamed Snowie. "Basil, Basil, do something!"




[At this point I am wondering again, why is it always me that has to fix effurything!?!]

I know it's a long shot but the only thing I can do is power up my lasers and let rip.

"Lasers engaged and arming," I said tensely as I powered up. "Step back Smooch, mew don't want to get in the way of these bad boys!"




My laser beams shot straight up through the boiling, bubbling clouds and bulls-eyed that volatile vortex.  There was an almighty cracking eruption like the sky was going to fall down, as the lightning and my lasers converged followed by another ginormous

 **KAAAAAAAA-BOOOOOOOOOM**




Abruptly the thunder stopped booming, the lightning stopping fizzing and zapping and the only noise was the rushing of air as the vortex began to close as high speed, sucking itself closed.




A few minutes later and the trans-dimensional vortex vanished with a high pitched squeaky popping sound and the sky slowly returned to normal.




Regular sky appeared. White fluffy clouds coasted through the beautiful big blue as we whooped in triumph.

"Really top job Smooch, those pom pom grenades were tremendous, where'd mew get them?" I asked.

He smirked and then confessed, "I found your secret ammo bunker Basil."

"Thank goodness mew did, but don't go playing with anything else, we don't want any accidents ok?" I said concerned fur his safety.  "We love mew just the way mew are!"  I patted him gently on the head.

"Sure thing!" Smoochie beamed happily.

"Thank goodness that's all over," Snowie sighed with relief as Amber started to stir.

"Is it?" I replied soberly looking straight at the Pesky Pink Menace.


'AND CUT!'


>^.^<


Well, like mew I'm so relieved that we have no more homicidal giant furry ballz in the garden.  The bad news is, the clean up and the worse news is, the P.A. will be home from work soon.  And I'm sure mew have even more questions than last week, like:

How will we explain a huge patch of scorched earth on the lawn? [Tricky one, purrhaps we blame Humphrey and say he pee'd on it, and the grass died - true story! MOL]

Is Furrz really, truly, 100% gone and do we have definitive proof of his extermination? [Yes, according to the various bits around the garden,  and unless someone is really clever at jigsaw puzzles, he's not coming back]

Will another trans-dimensional vortex open in the future? [I hope not, but mew neffur can be sure]

Who was P.K MacSquirrel? [My partner in the F.I.B. I called him Nutty, furry sadly he died saving the world, but he is remembered often and with much fondness] 

What are Pom Pom Grenades? [Furry, furry dangerous - DO NOT PLAY with them at all, like effur]

Do mew really have a secret arms and ammo bunker? [Yes, I do]

Can we see it? [No, mew can't]

Does Mattee Ballz really work fur the Postal Service? [Yes he does]

What are mew going to do with the Pesky Pink Menace? [That's next weeks episode]


>^.^<

Well my supurr furry furriends, that's all fur today's post, drop in tomorrow as I'm sure there will be something to tickle your fancy happening right here.  

In the meantime stay cool, calm and collected even in the face of great adversity and then have some nip!

Bestest Wednesday purrs

Basil & Co xox


25 comments:

  1. Whew! I know he's a pesky pink thing but I was beginnin' to feel sorry for that ol' flamingo.

    Purrs,
    Nissy #Niss4Senate - tell the PM, today.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh it's not over yet fur him Nissy!!! MOL

      Delete
  2. OMD!!! What a rip-roaring adventure!!! The craziest thing? I think your P.A. and I are telepathically connected--LOL! You can find out how/why in Destiny's next post, "Ode to Judith--Part II" ;)
    Can't week til next week's episode!! xo

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think mew're right!!! Can't wait to read that post!! :D

      Delete
  3. Hmmmm Meez finks meez missed sumfin here. Me fawt when we last left off da lazers wuz twyin' tu ovewload and mingle which wulda been bad fur sum weason youos had yet tu tall us. Meez missed da inneruction of Furry and Amber passin' out. Meez guesses me needs tu go back and figgew out where me messed up and got lost. Gweat story tho'. :)

    Luv ya'

    Dezi

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Awwwww Dezi... just go to the links at the beginning of the post and work back... mew'll soon find the one mew missed! ;)

      Glad mew're enjoying it though! XOX

      Delete
  4. Hoo Cat
    Never fun to have big hairy balls bouncing around the yard, unless maybe they are bringin letters from your pals... MOL
    Great job All preventing untold, oh, he did say didn't he, anymeow, told destruction on cats the world over
    Purrs my furend
    Timmy
    PS
    Finally got a copy of your out-of-print book!!!
    We will start it in a week or so
    Timmy again

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I know right, unless, like mew say they're delivering letters and parcels and cool stuff!!! MOL

      Thank mew fur getting a copy of my book, I really hope mew enjoy it! :D XOX

      Delete
  5. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  6. guys...we bee fair lee new two yur blog sew we will knead ta catch up on de saga storee...
    but we gotta give high paws ta furrz for one thing...him TRIED ta rid de werld oh de eeeevil vizshuz
    flamingo burd......

    { we haz thiz thing bout burdz...all burdz.....each N everee last one on de entire planet
    & then sum.....troo lee ♥ }

    happee white fish wednesday ☺☺☺

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. MOL mew guys are just too funny!!! MOL It's not over for that vizshuz eeeevil flamingo burd just yet.... muwahahahahaaaaa

      XOX

      Delete
  7. Hmmm, That pink Flamingo is quite the dude. It sure is a good thing you got him under control and showed him who was boss around there.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I know Mario, he really is a piece of work right? XOX

      Delete
  8. Oh wow! What a place to say "cut" !!!! hahaha!!!! This is so great! And I loved your alien video!
    ღ husky hugz ღ frum our pack at Love is being owned by a husky!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well we have to keep mew coming back fur more my supurr husky furriends!!! MOL XOX

      Delete
  9. Wow! That was PAWSOME! Halfway through where the Fuzz guy appeared, I watched some of the video before I read what was under it and I was thinking: "Umm....Ok the guy is getting blown up in places....why?" Then I read the text under the video and I was like "Ohhhhhh!!" MOL!
    Have a pawsome Wednesday!
    ❀Siamese Smothers and Tuxie Tickles❀ from Mikko and Jax at Happiness is Siamese!
    PS:
    I love the Pink Flamingo saga!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. MOL mew watched too soon, too funny!! Glad mew're enjoying it :D xox

      Delete
  10. Holy Moly, kitties! The moral of the story is "Don't mess with the Smoochie!" Good one for sure...way to go!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hey Clooney, yep the moral is: don't mess with Da Smoochinator! MOL xox

      Delete
  11. Wowee! What an amazing ending. We sure hope that's the last we've seen of that Fuzz dude. But like you said .... is it? :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dan dan dah????? I think Furrz the Ferocious is totally toast furever... thanks to Smoochie and his quick thinking with the Pom Pom Grenades! XOX

      Delete
  12. Oh wow! I have to read back to see the whole picture. Amazing story!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh yes Sushi, start at the beginning... otherwise mew might be wondering the on earth is going off! XOX Glad mew like it though :D

      Delete
  13. Hi Y'all!

    Another cliff hanger!

    Y'all come by now,
    Hawk aka BrownDog

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hiya Hawk, a cliffhanger is the only way to go here!!! MOL BOL MOL XOX

      Delete

*Waves Paw* we love comments and do purr extra loud when mew leave one, and we do try to reply to effurypurrdy and visit mew too! ❤️❤️❤️

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