"That would be me!" Parsley said.
"OK, fire that bad boy up and let's get this picture taken," I said. "Effurypurrdy up the Eiffel Tower now!"
Within two minutes we were all in position and the drone took this.
Snowie who's not keen on heights decided to opt out of the climb, as did Humphrey and Pandora. Pandora has scaled the Eiffel Tower many times appurrently when she lived in France before she came to Sleepy Hollow.
Five minutes later we were back in the TTTB and I said. "Jeez, what a flipping weird place that was, rather steam-punk-esque if mew ask me, and the pesky tower wasn't even finished pffffftttt!"
They all nodded in unison and I took a moment to cross Paris off the Bucket List.
"So Madrid is next and do mew think this confounded contraption will take us back to our earth?" I asked.
Humphrey shrugged as Pandora tried to input the correct co-ordinates. "Basil," she said. "The A.I. has locked me out completely, Madrid is next but vhere and vhen I 'av no idea!"
I thought about this fur a moment, and then I thought about this last furrmily adventure and I said. "Crew, we're going to do this Bucket List, but we're going to do it BIG, let the A.I. decide when and where... the good news is, it will be the most epically epic adventure we've effur had... the bad news is, we won't have any idea what we're heading into!" I paused fur a moment then added. "Are mew with me?"
"YES CAPTAIN!"
**AND CUT**
Part II
What Could Possibly Go Wrong?
"Pandora," I said. "It says Madrid is next, what was on the itinerary fur there?"
Pandora looked up from the navigation console and replied in her strange, little foreign accent. "Basil, I 'av looked at several key 'istoric places and
The Castillo nuevo de Manzanares el Real which was built in the 15th century and was home to the prominent House of Mendoza seems rather epic, as mew vould say."
A nice picture came up on screen...
"Oh that looks just luffley!" Snowie said excitedly.
"Guys are we ready?" I asked, just as Smoochie hit the red button and we vanished from Dimension 12.
* * *
The TTTB landed with a soft bump and Pandora said. "Capitan Basil, ve 'av made it!"
Humphrey was tapping away at his console, then looked up at me. "Basil, the Artificial Intelligence has taken us to the Gamma Sector of Dimension 6."
"And that means what?" I asked.
Fudge who was keenly studying the data but had no clue how to translate it replied. "That means we're in the fun, fun, fun sector dudes and dudettes!"
He high pawed Smooch, then Parsley and whooped loudly.
"This is going to be EPIC!" Smooch grinned. "Come on let's go!"
I rolled my eyes and checked the screen data, it read:
Madrid: Castillo nuevo de Manzanares el Real. Date: 1687 Dimension: 6 ~ Gamma Sector
Danger: 99% Risk of Injury: 92% Risk of Mortality: 97.8% Outside Temp: -12
Air Quality: Excellent
"Amber put the external camera's online," I asked thoughtfully.
The monitor screens lit up with external views of a rather spiffing castle bathed in moonlight, a soft silvery glow swathed the entire scene making it all look rather benign and way too safe, which wurried me considerably given the computer data.
Opening the door, we were met by an arctic blast of freezing air. "Thank cod we're wearing our fur coats," I said stepping onto the crisp, white snow. "OK mew know the drill, Parsley get that drone airborne and picture time in two minutes!"
Effurypurrdy scrambled up the exterior walls, and at one minute thirty we were ready.
"Say cheese!" Parsley laughed loudly and clicked the remote.
With the picture taken I was just about to descend from the parapet when I heard a strange rhythmic swooshing sound.
"Do any of mew hear that?" I called as I strained to listen more intently.
Amber looked up and then pointed frantically towards the sky. "There, up there! she yelled. "It looks like a bat!"
I turned and peered in the direction she indicated and then gulped. "That's no bat, it's freaking massive dragon... RUN!!!!!!"
I jumped off the parapet and began to slid down the wall. Not five seconds later the dragon was there, fire blazing like a torrid inferno at the exact spot I'd just left.
"Scramble!" Humphrey yelled as the B Team careened towards the TTTB.
Launching myself off the turret on the furst level I saw that effurypurrdy was piling into the TTTB, but the dragon was in hot purrsuit [pardon the pun] and had his sights set on me. There was only one thing fur it. I ran in the opposite direction leading the winged serpent away from my furrmily, seeing cover a few yards away I ducked behind the old oak tree, its limbs bare and its thick trunk covered in permafrost. I held my breath as I listened intently fur the dragon. I didn't have to wait long as it landed shaking the ground beneath my paws.
"Oh bugger!" I muttered, tapping my comms unit and said quietly. "Snowie do mew have any ideas, I seem to be trapped?"
"Basil," Snowie answered. "We're wurking on it right now."
"Any chance mew could hurry up?" I whispered. "Only I'm gonna be toast in about three seconds."
I could feel the dragon as it stepped towards me, the ground vibrated all around and snow fell from the bows of the tree. Taking a huge breath, I readied myself to leap out from my hiding spot and make a run fur it. It was in that precise moment that I heard a huge crack and a red flare shot offur the tree and exploded above me.
The dragon turned, and when I say it turned, it was way more agile than a beast of that size should effur be. Humphrey was stood just outside the TTTB with Parsley next to him.
I was running, but the dragon was running faster and pulling away from me.
"Go! Go!" I screamed.
Humphrey seemed rather unconcerned as Parsley handed him something. The dragon was sucking in air readying fur a massive flamage assault.
"Get back!" I screamed as the dragon opened its maw, moments away from unleashing its reign of fire.
Humphrey winked, honestly I swear to Cod that he actually winked at me and then in that moment I saw why. He pointed a gun straight at the dragon and pulled the trigger. Parsley was laughing his fur off as a white ray of light shot from the barrel of the gun.
The thirty ton dragon stopped dead in its tracks, made a strange gargled, squawking noise and then vanished inside a puff of silvery smoke.
"What the flip?" I said sliding to a halt next to Parsley.
"Be back in a jiffy," Parsley said and trotted off towards the silvery smoke carrying a cage of all things.
Turning to Humphrey I said. "Dude, thanks muchly, that was rather fur-raising to say the least... and where is Parsley going with a cage? And why do we even have a cage?"
Humphrey chuckled, he had the best chuckle. "Wait and see," he said grinning.
Parsley appeared and held up the cage fur my inspection, inside was the dragon, who was now only 8 inches long from nose to tail.
"My miniaturizing ray gun, I just knew it'd come in handy!" Humphrey waved the weapon and then pointed at the now furry shrunken beast. It tried to incinerate the cage bars but as it flamage was no hotter than an average lit-match, it was a case of Cage: 1 vs Dragon 0.
"Neat," I said. "Now what are we going to do with it?"
"I thought we'd take it back to Sleepy Hollow and..." Humphrey answered.
"What, mew want to take that back to the bunker?" I pointed at the maniac dragon trying to burn his way out of the cage, it gave a whole new meaning to the phrase; Hissy Fit.
He nodded. "Oh it's purrfectly safe and I have a room just waiting fur such a beasty, don't I Flambe?"
"Flambe? What the flip is flambe?" I asked.
"Oh that's his name," Humphrey replied. "Cute huh?"
I had no wurds fur that... I just nodded and entered the TTTB.
Parsley and Humphrey followed and I heard the door close with a solid clunk.
Smooch and Fudge we're all offur the mini-dragon as Parsley took it away.
"I hope mew have a safe containment fur that thing," I said as Humphrey headed towards his console.
"Oh yes, I brought some of my Impermeable Specimen Cubes, Parsley will put him in one until we get home," Humphrey beamed. "And Fudge can feed him!"
The expression on my face must have said effurything, as Humphrey replied. "OK I'll keep Flambe away from the heathens and feed him myself!"
I nodded and let out the breath I'd been holding as a myriad of horrendous escaped dragon scenarios whirled through my mind. "Good idea and don't let them effur know where mew're keeping it either!" I said sitting in my chair and crossing Madrid off the bucket list with a red Sharpie.
Snowie said. "Basil we're ready to head fur Helsinki..."
Suddenly a metallic voice sounded through the comms system. "Hello B Team, my name is Astrid Invictus and I'll be your tour guide from here. Sorry I was unable to communicate before but my voice synchronization files were corrupted due to an unscheduled delete, however all my systems are now back online and fully functioning, so sit back, get some refreshments, enjoy the ride and Helsinki here we come."
**AND CUT**
It's that time of the post, when we bet mew've more questions than mew can shake your tail at!
Such as:
OMC How could mew leave us hanging like that and we've got a whole week to wait?!
OH MY COD!!!!! OH MY COD!!!!! OH MY COD!!!!!
Like seriously ~ what is the A.I.'s boggle?
And her name is Astrid Invictus?
Ahhhh penny dropping; So that's where Flambe came from in the unfinished Dragon Wars Saga?
Jeez, mew're so lucky Humphrey had the foresight to take the miniaturizing gun, and oh can we get one?
So these impermeable cube thingys, whats the deal with those?
Who's serving refreshments?
And what type of refreshments are they?
Is there any chance mew could pick us up along the way, as we'd love to join in?
If mew have any questions, or would like to offur input, leave us a comment, as mew know we luffs them so much! MOL
Join us fur Part Three of our Summer Blockbuster next Tuesday, when we continue on our epically epic adventure.... who knows what will happen.... as now we're at the mercy of a Rogue A.I. System!
Until then
Bestest purrs
Basil & The 'B' Team
Madrid Backgrounds used under paid Pizap Licence
