**SERIES TWO** Melvyn's Mewsings ~ Episode 7 ~ Life in The BBHQ Library ~ One Shelf at a Time! **PLUS** Friday Fill-ins Blog Hop

The BBHQ Library Diaries: chaos, conundrums and possible carnage!!! MOL

Happy Friday, Epic Floofers

Welcome to Episode 7. If mew missed last week's thrilling episode, click the link below:

Series Two

Episode 1     Episode 2     Episode 3

Episode 4     Episode 5     Episode 6

If mew remember, last season I was only in charge of the library archive on level 6 in the BBHQ bunker, and if mew missed it, I think mew should click the links below to catch up on all the chaos.

      Episode 1     Episode 2     Episode 3     

 Episode 4     Episode 5     Episode 6

 Episode 7     Episode 8     Episode 9

This series, I'm spending my time between level 6 and the main Mewton-Clawson library at BBHQ in the courtyard, so read on to see what's happened this week! 

Amber's Postcard Communique

Amber's latest postcard arrived this morning, confirming that she accepted Conte Silvano dei Gatti's invitation and is now travelling from Positano to Rome aboard a private luxury train.

Judging by the postcard, she's having a marvellous time.

Raffi transmitted another stealth fax shortly afterwards.

“Melvyn, a small matter regarding the Grand Roman Gala. Conte Silvano feels Amber requires an exquisite evening gown for the occasion.

I've secured a private appointment with Madama Celestina Gattavelli, one of Rome's most esteemed haute couturiers, who has agreed to close her atelier exclusively for Amber's fitting. The Conte will cover all costs.

Do mew think Amber would be amenable to this?

Raffi”

I immediately replied by fax:

“Raffi, she's Amber. Just keep an eye on the wasp spray!”

His response arrived three minutes and thirty seconds later.

“Understood.”

Clive the Paperclip snatched the postcard from the internal mail chute and hurtled towards me.

“Melvyn, just look at her!” he gasped.

Several definitive clicks sounded as Gordon the Stapler appeared, looking a little forlorn.

“Good gravy,” I said. “She really is living her best life!”

Clive nodded. “She is the role model of role models.”

Gordon was unusually still as he stared at the postcard.

I patted him gently and added, “Don't worry, she'll be back soon.”

Clive let out a dreamy sigh and turned to Gordon. "Melvyn's right, she'll be back soon and can tell us all about her adventures."

Gordon hesitated, clicked once and slunk off into the stationery drawer.

"That was odd," I said.

Clive glanced at the drawer and then whispered. "His passport was denied."

Meet The Library Mice

Each week, I'm going to introduce mew to all the library mice, one at a time

There are nine: Oswald, Snitch, Velvet, Tootles, Ardvaar, Nibbles, Lumie, Chedds and Flora. Oh, and plus one owl, Hootbert, who appeared a few weeks ago on a completely random Tuesday; he flew in and never left.

Lumie ~ Magical Phenomena & Enchanted Collections ~ M.P.E.C.

Official Library Mouse Pawtrait

⭐ A Short Chat with Lumie ~ Magical Phenomena & Enchanted Collections ~ M.P.E.C.⭐

Melvyn: Lumie, what exactly does a Magical Phenomena & Enchanted Collections Mouse do?

Lumie: I look after things that glow, hum, float, whisper, sparkle or behave suspiciously on Tuesdays.

Melvyn: That's quite a lot of the library.

Lumie: I know. Isn't it wonderful?

Melvyn: And your spellbooks are humming again.

Lumie: They're happy.

Melvyn: How can mew tell?

Lumie: Happy hums in B-flat.

Melvyn: Of course it does. How did mew come to BBHQ?

Lumie: I used to work for a very bad-tempered wizard in another realm. I sorted his spellbooks, prepared his magical ingredients and looked after all his enchanted things.

Melvyn: That sounds rather interesting.

Lumie: It would have been, except he locked me in a cage every night so I couldn't escape.

Melvyn: Lumie!

Lumie: I didn't like him very much.

Melvyn: I can see why!

Lumie: Then one night, a glittering envelope appeared inside my cage. I opened it, and there was an invitation from Amber. Then a rather glowy, glittery portal appeared.

Melvyn: Inside the cage?

Lumie: Yep! I grabbed my lilac bow and my small bag with the only belongings I had, jumped through, and landed in the library.

Melvyn: And what did mew do?

Lumie: Danced.

Melvyn: Immediately?

Lumie: I was free, Melvyn. It seemed appropriate.

Melvyn: That's lovely. What do mew love most about BBHQ?

Lumie: Everything I'm allowed to explore. Enchanted books, strange lights, magical objects, portals... and nopawdy puts me in a cage. And most impawtantly, it feels like family here.

Melvyn: Awww. Final question. Why is your bow at that angle?

Lumie: Deep contemplation.

Melvyn: What are mew contemplating?

Lumie: Whether that book behind me is about to levitate.

Melvyn: Is it?

Lumie: Already has.

Melvyn: Interview over.

Lumie: Mew might want to duck.

FYI: I am working on the Library Mice Origin Story and will share it later, once I've collated all the info and backstories from each mouse.

📚 Melvyn's Mewsings: Entry #07

Title: The Intern - certified with a diploma ~ Tales From a Chaos-filled Library

Status: Unsnoopervised. Curiosity Piquing. Portal Investigation In Progress.

Location: Level 6 Library Archive  Time: 11.19am B.S.T. (Bunker Standard Time)

Archive: Has stopped ding-donging whenever I say not again. It now emits a low hmmmm whenever Floump's Cube of Averon pings, and following the courtyard wobble, three shelves have begun leaning in the same direction despite the floor being purrfectly level.

💬 Opening Quote

“When the ground wobbles and Floump looks excited, running becomes a purrfectly reasonable administrative response.”

⚠ Situation Report:

Amber: Now aboard a private luxury train en route to Rome and the Grand Roman Gala. Raffi has arranged a private appointment with one of Rome's most esteemed haute couturiers for an exquisite evening gown. Apparently, managing Amber now involves trains, aristocats and exclusive atelier closures. He seems remarkably calm about this.

Vera Prime: Still allegedly air-gapped. Still isn't. Has upgraded last week's “incipient wobblification” to “active wobble event.” Refuses to explain whether this is better or worse and has instead produced a flowchart entitled When the Floor Becomes Theoretical.

Gordon the Stapler: Passport application DENIED. Has abandoned pre-departure click conditioning and retreated to the stationery drawer. One very small click has been heard since breakfast. Clive is concerned.

Clive the Paperclip: Neon-orange neck pillow temporarily abandoned. Currently hovering near the stationery drawer and insisting that “there must be an appeals process.” Has already requested Form ST-AP1 despite nopawdy knowing whether such a form exists.

Reginald: Cape still attached. Dignity less so. Following the courtyard wobble, he reached the bunker entrance partly by running and partly by accidental flight. Currently maintaining that this was a “controlled tactical withdrawal.” Snitch has the footage.

Parsley: Reunited with Prodder Mk I and refusing to let it out of his sight. Prodder Mk II appears jealous and has been pretending to be a fork. Parsley says this is “emotionally complicated engineering.” He dropped by with a seafood pizza with extra cheese, a silvervine, guava and strawberry juice box, plus four almond slices with catnip sprinkles, and, unsurprisingly, there was an empty wrapper, apparently “sampled for quality control!” (It seems Parsley isn't fond of doughnuts! MOL)

Fergus: Cupboard 10G remains Art Deco Nebula Chic. Has requested a chaise longue. The cupboard is approximately three feet wide. Fergus says this is “negative thinking.” Then promptly asked for Humphrey's miniaturising ray gun. I don't know how I feel about that.

P.U.M.A. aka the glitter calculator: Scrabble tile negotiations remain unresolved. Display currently scrolling: SOLIDARITY… LETTER RIGHTS… NO VOWEL LEFT BEHIND… The haunted laminator has offered to mediate. This has helped absolutely nopawdy.

🐾 Parsley’s Contribution (Unhelpful Voice Memo #2-7)

“Attention everypawdy, Parsley here with a completely controlled post-wobble update.

First, Floump is fine. In fact, he's delighted. Apparently, violent interdimensional ground movement qualifies as ‘exciting.’

Secondly, Prodder Mk I is back, slightly singed, mildly traumatised and refusing to discuss the pocket dimension. Prodder Mk II has responded by pretending to be a fork.

Thirdly, the Wedge of Wonder's holographic crown is still there, now projecting onto the ceiling. Apparently, it's permanent now. Vera says this may constitute ‘a significant escalation in cheese governance.’ I have no idea what that means.

Finally, the energetic wobblies outside the archive have vanished.

Not faded. Vanished. Snitch says that's statistically worse.

I asked him to stop helping.

Parsley out.”

The Wedge of Wonder (cheese entity):

The Wedge of Wonder remains in Aisle ‘H’, where the tiny holographic crown has now become permanent.

More concerningly, several small pieces of parchment appeared around the cheeseboard overnight.

Each bears the same message:

BY ORDER OF THE WEDGE

Unfortunately, nothing appears beneath it.

Oswald says an official proclamation without an actual proclamation is “administratively useless.”

Flora says it's “building suspense.”

Ardvaar has advised everypawdy not to acknowledge its sovereignty until we know what it wants.

The Wedge responded with a long, disapproving:

Hmmmmmmmm.

Oswald has extended his break.

💬 Melvyn’s Purrsonal Chat Log - Entry #7:

Status: Amber is aboard a private luxury train to Rome. Floump is thrilled to be at BBHQ. Gordon is not thrilled about anything.

Location: BBHQ Level Six Library Archive - Library Nook Terminal (between the moderately amenable haunted laminator, P.U.M.A. plotting vengeance, and several bad-tempered Scrabble tiles threatening an uprising based on Letter Solidarity.) 

Verging on: Interdimensional repercussions, unauthorised cheese governance and a stationery-based emotional crisis.

Melvyn: So the Oddity isn't actually called the Oddity. It's Floump's travel shell. Which contains a pocket dimension. Obviously.

Melvyn: Floump monitored portals for months, waited for one to open near BBHQ, grabbed his Cube of Averon and jumped through because his uncle Bob wouldn't bring him to meet Basil.

Melvyn: I admire the planning. I question absolutely everything else.

Melvyn: More importantly, Floump didn't open the portal.

Melvyn: So who did?

Melvyn: Vera Prime answered that question with a probability chart and the words “insufficiently comforting data.”

Melvyn: Prodder Mk I has been recovered. Parsley is delighted. Prodder Mk II is pretending not to care and has been a fork since breakfast.

Melvyn: The Wedge of Wonder apparently considers itself some kind of cheese monarch now. I am not recognising its sovereignty without the appropriate paperwork.

Melvyn: Amber is travelling to Rome aboard a rather decadent private train, and Raffi has arranged a private haute couture fitting for the Grand Roman Gala.

Melvyn: Gordon's passport was denied.

Melvyn: He hasn't mentioned it.

Melvyn: Neither have I.

Melvyn: Clive has already started looking for an appeals form.

Melvyn: And apparently the ground wobbling violently beneath BBHQ has made Floump even more excited about having an adventure.

Melvyn: I have added a new sticky note to my sweater vest:

“WHO OPENED THE FLUFFING PORTAL?”

End of chat....

🤖 Library Archive Chat Logs: Melvyn vs. Vera Prime 

– The “Who Opened The Fluffing Portal?” Edition

 (Vera Prime remains air‑gapped in theory, but not in any meaningful interpretation of the word)

Time: 17.25BST - Bunker Standard Time

Location: BBHQ Level Six Library Archive

System Status: Stable-ish. Floor currently horizontal.

Probability Everything Is Fine: 6%

Melvyn: Vera, Floump didn't open the portal.

Vera Prime: Correct.

Melvyn: Don't say it like mew knew.

Vera Prime: I suspected.

Melvyn: Can mew tell who opened it?

Vera Prime: No. However, analysis of the dimensional residue indicates the portal was not random.

Melvyn: Meaning?

Vera Prime: Deliberate. Probability: 96%.

Melvyn: So somepawdy deliberately opened a portal near BBHQ?

Vera Prime: Correct.

Melvyn: And Floump just happened to detect it from Catopia?

Vera Prime: Correct. And here's a haiku you definitely didn't ask for:

Pink floof crossed the void
Uncle Bob distinctly said no
Floump found a loophole

Melvyn: Disturbingly accurate. What about the wobble?

Vera Prime: Not caused by Floump.

Melvyn: Oh fluff. Is the portal still open?

Vera Prime: ...

Melvyn: Vera?

Vera Prime: Define “open.”

Chat ended… Because I didn't like the direction this conversation was heading.

The Oddity From The Sky

Melvyn's Purrsonal and Private Diary ~ Entry #7

Wobble.

The courtyard tilted again.

“EVERYPAWDY INSIDE!” Miss Warts yelled.

I didn't need telling twice.

Parsley grabbed Floump, Mogs grabbed the remains of the Oddity, and I grabbed absolutely nothing because I was already halfway to the bunker.

WOBBLE.

Behind us, something crashed.

“MY PRODDAAAAAAH!” Parsley shrieked.

“Got it!” Floump cried, waving Prodder Mk I above his head.

Of course he did.

We piled through the bunker entrance just as another vibration rolled beneath our paws.

Then everything stopped.

Silence.

Floump looked around hopefully. “Was that it?”

“Was what it?” I panted.

“My adventure.”

“No!”

His ears drooped.

Mogs took the Cube of Averon from him. The violet lines across its surface were still pulsing.

Miss Warts frowned. “Floump, when mew found the portal, mew said it looked purrfect.”

“Yep.”

“What did mew mean?”

Floump shrugged. “Stable. Clean edges. No dimensional shredding. Really good alignment.”

I stared at him. “Dimensional shredding?”

“It's bad.”

“Thank mew, Floump,” Miss Warts said.

Mogs turned the Cube slowly in his paws. “That portal wasn't accidental.”

Everything went very quiet.

Parsley stopped gripping his Prodder.

“How do mew know?” I asked.

“Accidental portals are messy,” Miss Warts said. “Unstable. Like the one at Mogwarts.”

Mogs nodded. “This one was made properly.”

“So somepawdy opened it?”

“Somepawdy or something,” Miss Warts replied.

Floump's eyes widened with delight. “Ohhhhhh.”

“No,” I said immediately.

“But...”

“No.”

“But this is definitely an adventure,” Floump beamed.

PING!

The Cube flashed violet.

Floump grinned.

I pointed at him. “Don't.”

“I didn't do anything!”

For once, I believed him.

Mogs stared at the Cube. “It's detecting something.”

“Another portal?” Parsley asked.

Mogs shook his head slowly. “The same one.”

I swallowed. “But it's closed.”

Miss Warts glanced towards the ceiling.

“No,” she said. “It's moved.”

Floump's enormous ears shot upright.

I closed my eyes. “Oh, fluff, not again!”

Until the next diary entry…

Here's Floump!

 

Jammie Dodgers are his new favourite biscuit right now! MOL

The P.A. is joining in the Friday Fill-ins Blog Hop with the pawesome 15 & Meowing and Four-Legged Furballs.

1. I have been seeing a lot of ___________________________.

2. _________________ is a good way to make some extra money.

3. I think _________ was the decade with the best _________.

4. Lately, I’ve been avoiding _________.

The P.A.'s answers are...

1. I have been seeing a lot of ladybirds in the garden. They were conspicuously absent during the summer-long heatwave, so it's lovely to see them back. Also, the hedgehogs disappeared around the 3rd week of July and have not returned. I'm very sad about this, even though I still put snacks out for them every night, just in case they roll up. I suspect that they went closer to the river and found some good places for sluggy snacks. I shall keep watching to see if they return.

2. Selling stuff you no longer want is a good way to make some extra money. I used to sell on eBay. But now I think there are better platforms.

3. I think the 1990s was the decade with the best music. I like all kinds of music, but I really like house, deep house, trance, dance, all that stuff, and the sounds back then were epic. The raves were great fun! LOL

4. Lately, I’ve been avoiding the vegetable garden; don't ask me why. I have no idea. Cat Dad goes and brings produce back, but I'm staying on this side of the door that says Secret Garden on it! LOL 

  Other Fun Blog Hops to Join in Today ~ Click the links below      

  Brian's Home  

 

   Catblog'o'sphere  

   

  Feline Friday   

     Saturday Critters    

📚 Library Closing Notes

📖 Books re-shelved today: 47 (another 19 fell off during the wobble)

🧀 Cheese incidents:  4 (one may now constitute an official proclamation)

📦 Unexplained archive oddities:  5.7 (we explained Floump; unfortunately, this created several new questions)

☕ Cups of catnip tea consumed:  4, plus one silvervine, guava and strawberry juice box and one can of primo catnip blaster

🍰 Almond slices consumed: 3 

📚 Calmness Tracker pens: 51% ~ down 13% from last week

🐉 Dragons startled:  1 (Reginald maintains the courtyard evacuation was a “controlled tactical withdrawal”)

📦 Closing Thoughts from Your Intern

Today we learned something important; I wish we hadn't.

According to Vera, the portal Floump used to reach BBHQ wasn't random - it was deliberately opened.

Which means somepawdy, or something, created a purrfectly stable interdimensional doorway near BBHQ.

We don't know who, and we don't know why.

Also, the courtyard wobble wasn't caused by Floump either.

So now we have:

a portal nopawdy admits to opening

a Cube of Averon that keeps pinging

a suspicious amount of dimensional residue

a cheese entity developing political ambitions

Gordon sulking in the stationery drawer

and one teenage Fuzzykin who thinks all of this is ABSOLUTELY FLUFFING BRILLIANT.

Floump wanted an adventure, and I'm beginning to suspect he's going to get one.

Until next Friday in the library…

Keep your whiskers steady, your dimensional gateways accounted for, and if Vera Prime ever responds to a simple question with “Define open,” perhaps start running before she finishes the sentence.

And don't forget to always, and I mean always...

The Unpaid and Now Moderately Assisted Library Intern 

Melvyn

Click here to go to Episode 8 ~ link coming later

Stay tuned for more archival chaos, and Melvyn stumbling into unforeseen archive areas... subscribe or risk missing the next library mystery! 

Don't say we didn't warn mew! 

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