**FESTIVE RERUN**TOP SECRET~ CLASSIFIED B TEAM FILES **2016 REVISITED** FAST, FURRY & DANGEROUS ~ REVENGE OF THE P.I.T.H ~ Part I

**TOP SECRET - DO NOT READ WITHOUT CLEARANCE** 

CLASSIFIED B TEAM FILES 

**2016 REVISITED** 

FAST, FURRY & DANGEROUS

The B Team are on a hazardous and deadly mission to save Mewton-Clawson, can they do it?

  

Part I

Back in the day as a F.I.B. Agent 

[Field Intelligence Bureau]

**And Action!**

It was a cold February dawn in 2007, the frost-covered land glimmered and sparkled with a golden patina as the sun rays broke through a light mist.  My breath formed tiny white-vapour clouds as I chuntered quietly to myself about being stupid enough to be here in the middle of nowhere in this freezing weather, this early in the morning. 

I wrapped my scarf tighter around my neck while I waited by an ancient oak tree; its branches were bare and covered in a powdery dusting of snow as I scanned the hedgerows and the surrounding woodland fur my contact.  Skeletal-looking trees who were standing like lone sentinels guarding their fields cast long grey shadows as I paced with much agitation and the minutes continued to tick by while I got colder and colder despite the suns continued efforts to rise.  Finally deciding that something must be wrong I put in my headset and contacted Control.

"Control, this is Agent Basil, my C.I. hasn't arrived and I'm getting worried," I said into my comms unit. "Do mew have satellite surveillance on my position?"

"This is Control, copy that Agent Basil, we're checking your local now," a voice replied in a rather efficient manner.

A few moments later my comms crackled and the voice said, "Agent Basil we're zooming in on your position now..."

"Copy that," I replied as I paced around the tree again, the icy ground crunching loudly with each step.

"It would seem that mew have several unknowns surrounding your current local," there was a brief pause. "Our thermal cameras are picking up eight unknowns and your C.I. is nowhere to be seen."

I pondered this fur a second. "Can mew zoom in on my guests and give me an indication of who they are?"

"Yes sir, switching to normal vision now... zooming in now!"  the voice said.

"Good," I answered, a little anxious as to whom else would be out here, at his unholy hour in the middle of nowhere when I just happen to have a scheduled meeting with my best C.I.

My comms unit crackled again. "Agent Basil, mew need to abort, I repeat mew need to abort the mission NOW!"

*   *   *

Present day

"Basil! Basil! Basil!" Smoochie almost screamed as he hurtled into the control room in the [now not secret] bunker. He was breathless and looked most flustered as he slid to an ungainly halt next to me.

"Smooch, dude, what on earth's the matter?" I asked.

"Heli... heli... heli..." he spluttered trying to catch his breath.

"Heli what?"

"HELICOPTER!"

I stared at his upset expression with much perplexity. 

"There's a... F.I.B. helicopter... landing down... the field... Basil!" his voice trembled and he started to get really agitated.

"Little dude, take a breath," I said gently. "Now start at the beginning."

Smooch gulped several big breaths to no avail before he continued.

"Me and Parsley... down field... heard chopper... looked up... saw F.I.B. logo... began to descend... towards field," he said trying to catch his panicked breath. "Coming to... get mew... Basil?"

Realizing what he meant, I stared wide-eyed at him.  "Coming to get me, fur what?" I asked uncertainly. "Smooch mew know I retired a long time ago, I'm done with that life."

"But what if..." Smoochie choked the wurds out.

"Smooch there's no what-ifs, especially if mew and the rest of the hoard aren't included, mew know that!" I said firmly. "Comprende?"

Smoochie nodded and his tense grimace relaxed slightly.

Snowie was sitting quietly at the comms desk, listening intently but making no comment until several lights on the desk began to flash.

"Basil, Parsley is on channel one," she said efficiently.

"Put him on loudspeaker," I said gently.

"Control come in, this is Parsley!"

"Parsley, we hear mew, what's your boggle dude?" I asked.

"I'm down the field and there's this dude dude, he says he knows mew... offur."

"Ask him his name."

"Copy that," Parsley answered before replying a few moments later. "Dude he says his name is C.J. Catkin."

Without realising I took a really sharp breath, the air made a swooshing noise as my lungs filled.  I exhaled furry slowly suddenly aware that Snowie and Smoochie were watching me with keen regard.

"Who the flip is C.J. Catkin?" Snowie asked abruptly breaking my mental revelry. 

I paused then said, "Parsley tell C.J. he has to wait by the chopper, furst we need an emergency meeting in the bunker.  Snowie get the team in here asap!"

Minutes later we were all assembled in the control room.

Parsley held up his phone with a picture on its screen, "Do mew know this dude, dude?" he asked.

I glanced at it briefly and then nodded, "Yes I know him!"

Six expectant faces stared at me, waiting for an explanation.  I took a slow deliberate breath as I organised the jumbled memories in my mind that had flooded in and ravelled my brain up tighter than a ball of wool in a catnip frenzy the moment I saw his picture.

"Back in 2007 I was wurking on a case, C.J. was a newbie at F.I.B. control but we wurked well together on many cases as he advanced through the Bureau, anyhoo I digress... this purrticular case was huge and another agency, The PITH or Private Intelligence Task-Force Headquarters were also investigating," I paused as I collected my thoughts. "Early one morning I was supposed to meet my best C.I. aka criminal informant fur the intel that would finally bring down a huge crime syndicate that traded in exotic animals."

Humphrey's hackles rose and he hissed angrily. "Did mew get those vile suckers Basil?"

I nodded and sighed. "Yes Humphrey I got them but the cost was high."

My six fursibs understood and nodded solemnly.

"That morning my C.I. neffur showed yet there were eight PITH Agents ready to ambush me!  Now to this day, I don't know how they found out about our meeting but they had nefarious intentions fur sure," taking a breath I continued. "Luckily fur me C.J. was at HQ in the comms room and without him alerting me to their presence that day who knows what would have happened."

"How did mew get away from them?" Smooch asked.

"Luckily I was trying out a new device called an i-MACK or Invisibility Mack, one push of a button and the wearer is rendered completely invisible and undetectable by any type of device including infrared, it was a great design and it wurked a treat that day enabling me to get intel from the PITH Agents without them having a clue!" I chuckled as I remembered how angry they were at my incredible escape. "I found out they were actually trying to stop me from closing down the criminal element as those eight agents were durty, corrupt muther-fluffers and they were on the payroll of the crime syndicate and didn't want their payday coming to a close, so that morning they had plans fur me plus they'd already found my C.I. and disposed of him that's why he neffur showed to the meeting!"

Horrified gasps sounded all around me.

"But where are those PITH agents now?" Amber asked.

I shook my head and shrugged, "As far I as I know they were squirrelled away to the top-secret maximum security facility located under The Tower of London, which I called; The Dungeon, I'll leave the rest to your imagination.  I will say this though, it was a most heinous and distressing place to be!"

"So why has this C.J. dude appeared today?" Parsley asked.

I gave them a grim smile. "After I left the Bureau C.J. ended up as The Primo Director of The F.I.B. but he was still an Opurrations Manager the day I left and he said to me; 'Basil if those PITH Agents effur surface again mew're going to have a huge purroblem, but don't wurry I've got your back no matter what!'  and that's the only reason I can think that he's here today."

"Mew think those eight pith-heads are out of The Dungeon?" Humphrey asked his hackles bristling again. "Don't mew wurry Basil, were armed to the teeth and dangerous as heck and we've got your back!"

"Yeah!" Smoochie agreed. "We're fast, furry and dangerous, those pith-heads have no idea what they're dealing with dude!"

 I gave them all a tight smile, nodded gratefully and said, "Look guys I'd better go and get C.J."

"We're coming too!" six voices said in unison.

"I have to do this alone, ok?" I replied. "But mew can watch me from here, get the drone out if mew like."

*    *     *

I emerged from the bunker entrance behind the summer house and stepped out into the fresh air, it was a cloudy day but still warm.  Birds twittered in the trees, bees buzzed zipping from flower to flower and the butterflies fluttered aimlessly as if they had all day to do nothing.

I walked down the field towards the chopper and saw my old furriend waiting patiently fur my arrival.

C.J. Catkin hadn't changed one bit since I'd last seen him, apurt from being a little more solid, if mew get my drift.

I waved as I approached the chopper and he jumped down to meet me.

"C.J. great to see mew," I said extending my paw in greeting. "But it's a shame it's under these purrticular circumstances."

He shook my paw and nodded solemnly. "Good to see mew too Agent Basil, it's been a long time!"

I nodded. "Indeed it has."

"I'm sorry just to drop in out of the blue but I'm sure mew know why I'm here."

I nodded again.

"Those eight PITH agents busted out of The Dungeon a few days ago and we can't find them anywhere," he said gravely. "There's not one lead either and that only leads me to conclude that they're out fur revenge and mew my old pal, are their numero uno target."

I nodded again, already aware of all the implications of his unexpected visit, then I cast my gaze towards the briefcase he was holding rather tightly.

"C.J. we'll talk in the bunker and I'll introduce mew to the rest of the team," I said leading the way.

We walked in silence until we finally reached the control room and upon entering we were met by the team, all up and at attention, like the purrfect furry, fighting squad they were.

"C.J. mew've already met Parsley, he's our newest recruit," I began as we moved along the line. "This is Smooch, Amber, Snowie, Humphrey and Angel Posie."

C.J. shook effuryones paw until he got to Posie, he gave me a 'what do I do now' glance and I grinned.

"Posie is our Cloud Opurrative, she departed fur the rainbow bridge a while back but has managed to stay an active purrticipant in the corporeal wurld in her non-corporeal form," I explained.

"Oh fur flips sake Basil, just say that I'm The Phantom and let's move on!" Posie said brusquely.

"C.J. meet The Phantom aka Posie," I laughed.

"It's furry nice to meet mew Miss Phantom and I must say mew're the furst ghost I've effur met!" C.J. mused thoughtfully. 

Posie smirked and extended her paw.  C.J. tentatively reached out and touched her ghostly paw, his slipping right through it.

"Whoa!" he breathed shaking his paw. "That felt like voltage. Like a mini taser!"

We all burst out laughing and then I explained. "Posie uses an electro-magnetic field generator to make herself visible to us, she draws the power directly from that purpose built generator, show him Posie."

Posie ambled to a glass box which appeared as if by magic from the centre of the main control panel, inside suspended mid-air was a gold metal disc that appeared to be rotating of its own volition.  Paw extended she reached straight through the glass and touched the disc, a second later her light body glowed a vivid gold and she seemed to pulse with the golden light.  

C.J. took a sharp inhale, "Oh my cat!"

Posie withdrew her paw and appeared even more solid than she had before.

"I can touch and feel stuff when I'm fully charged," she said smugly and then chuckled as she added. "The aftur-life has posed no challenge fur me!"

"I'm furry impressed," C.J. said in amazement and then turned to me saying. "Agent Basil, The Bureau could really use some of that tech if mew're willing to share?"

I shrugged and then said. "C.J. I'm not an agent anymore, mew know that!"

He took a slow, deep breath before answering rather apologetically. "That's the reason fur my visit, I'm here to officially reinstate mew. It's in your contract, Claws 10, sub-section 89J, paragraph 15, line 7."  He pulled a copy of my contract out of the briefcase and handed it to me.

The B Team stared in disbelief and then pandemonium erupted.

** And Cut **

It's that time, when we bet mew've more questions than mew can shake your tail at!

Such as:

OMC are mew really going to let yourself be press-ganged back into The F.I.B.?

Is Posie just floating around the ether, like all the time?

Can we get an i-Mack?

What's in C.J.'s briefcase?

Does this mean mew will abandon The B Team and go back to your old life?

How dangerous are those PITH-heads?

What lengths will the PITH-heads go to in exacting their revenge?

etc...

We're sure mew have many, many more but sadly we've run out of time today!

Many thanks for joining us for our epic re-run of

FAST, FURRY & DANGEROUS

Don't furget to sneak back into the CLASSIFIED FILE ROOM for Part II on Monday!

Until then

DON'T GO OUT OF THE GARDEN!!!

Bestest purrs

Commander Basil 

& 

Follow Us @BionicBasil®  at Instacat

**PLEASE NOTE**

Copyright © 2021/22 by BionicBasil® & Cathrine Garnell  ~ Author & Publisher

All rights reserved. No part of this blog serialized publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including; content scraping, screen shots, blatant copying or any other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the author and publisher. For permission requests, write to the publisher, addressed “Attention: Permissions Coordinator,” at the email address below:

cathrinegarnell @gmail . com

Graphics created with paid licence www.canva.com and www.pizap.com

Bunker Background Images used with paid license from Shutterstock.com

**TOP SECRET - CLASSIFIED B TEAM FILES RERUN** **2016 REVISITED** FAST, FURRY & DANGEROUS ~ REVENGE OF THE P.I.T.H ~ Part II

**TOP SECRET - DO NOT READ WITHOUT CLEARANCE** 

CLASSIFIED B TEAM FILES 

**2016 REVISITED** 

FAST, FURRY & DANGEROUS

The B Team are on a hazardous and deadly mission to save Mewton-Clawson, can they do it?

Pawesome greetings supurr pals

Welcome to Part II of our epically epic and rather explosive report ~ only available here, fur your eyes only in the CFR [Classified File Room], and if mew missed last weeks report, here's the link:

Report Part One 

Part II

Sticking it to the Bureau and a big surprise!

**And Action!**

"QUIET!" I yelled as my fur-sibs were all shouting at once.

No way! Not fair! That's garbage! Basil would neffur sign that! It's a fake! It's a travesty!

Basil mew aren't going back, are mew?  What will we do without mew? 

I was horrified to say the least when C.J. waved the contract in front of me. 

"What is all this nonsense?" I asked, my voice hardened to steel. 

"It's in your contract," C.J. answered rather sheepishly.

"What's all this Claws 10 fluff mew just mentioned?" I asked. "I do not, and I repeat I do not effur remember signing anything that would give the F.I.B. any power to reinstate me aftur my retirement!"

C.J. took a weary sigh. "Just before mew left, all agents signed a new contract and Claws 10 was the addendum to the existing contracts," he said. "Look here's your paw-print." He pointed to the back page.

"What's the date?" I asked.

C.J. looked at the back page before answering. "It says 25th October 2009."

"Give it to me," I said sharply. "And effurypurrdy clear out, I need a minute alone!"

The B Team trooped out into the corridor followed by C.J. and I hit the button to close the doors. I just couldn't believe this was happening, not now, not aftur all this time.

Hearing the uproar breaking out in the corridor as my team began to verbally roast C.J. did make me smile fur about sixteen seconds and then I turned my attention to the task at paw.

I took the contract and sat at the centre console with my magnifying glass and read the microscopic small print.

"Flipping flip, freaking flipping flip!" I spat angrily as I read the Claws 10, sub-section 89J, paragraph 15, line 7.

It said and I quote.

'Any former or retired agent can be reinstated at any time by the Field Investigation Bureau at their sole discretion.'

It was that simple. I stared at the back page at my paw-print signature and then at the date and cast my mind back trying to remember if I actually signed it or not, and to be honest I really couldn't remember.

Aftur several minutes of deliberation I opened the doors and called them all back in. 

Smooch cracked up laughing when he saw the metal bin and me holding a lit match to the contract.

It burst into flames a moment later and I said. "C.J. I'm not being pressed-ganged... not by mew or the F.I.B. and this is what I think to your Claws freaking 10 garbage!"

C.J nodded and said. "I thought mew'd say that."

The B Team whooped in delight as I stood my ground saying. "I understand your position as Primo Director C.J. but mew should know better than anypurrdy, if mew put a lever on me, a herd of wild horses won't make me do anything I don't want to do.

C.J. mopped his brow with a floppy red hanky and then blew his nose. "That's why I have a different kind of purrposal fur mew as my furst exercise didn't wurk," he said and then carefully surveyed the rest of the team with a keen appraising eye.

"I'm listening," I said flatly watching my fur-sibs expressions, knowing that they were all as nervous as a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs.

"Agent Basil, mew were our top opurrative fur so long and no-one knows the job better than mew," C.J. began. "Plus mew were the only Agent to gain intimate knowledge of the rogue PITH Agents before their incarceration and survive, that in itself is a rare achievement."

I watched him thoughtfully as he took a deep breath and continued. "The F.I.B. needs mew to take down these rogue agents by any means necessary, if mew were to come back as an Agent then any fallout would be down to the F.I.B not mew purrsonally, but I understand if that's not what mew want."

I considered what C.J. said and replied. "Is there no one else to take those PITH-heads down?"

"No, not with your expertise and skills," C.J. answered. "I'd just be sending Agents on a suicide mission."

I knew he was right, agents today just didn't have the same 'grit' as us old-school hard-cases.

I stared at my fur-sibs, Smooch was grinning like the Cheshire cat that got all the cream, the catnip and the mouse mousse, I could see a hundred scenarios zooming through his mind as he thought about getting into the FRAY!  'Oh, Goddess Bast have mercy on my soul fur this!' I thought.

"C.J. I'll do this one job fur mew," I said resolutely knowing that if I didn't we were all doomed anyway. "But there are several conditions or claws's."

"OK," C.J. answered carefully, removing a notepad and a fountain pen from his briefcase.

"Furst, there is no I, we are a team..."

Smooch whooped and high-fived the entire team before saying. "Yeah we're a team, mister fibber primo boss cat!" he laughed.

I gave Smooch a 'that was a little too much dude,' look before I continued. "C.J. the F.I.B. can hire us all, aka The B-Team as independent contractors or clean-up facilitators to rectify your purroblem but with the F.I.B. taking all responsibility fur any fallout, casualties, property damage and the like," I saw the look on C.J.'s face as he paled. "This is not a negotiation C.J. it's a take it or leave it offur!"

C.J. scribbled frantically on his official F.I.B. notepad before saying, "Continue."

"The F.I.B. will provide all the latest tech to be at our disposal immediately and also provide any assistance, vehicles, aircraft or other items that we may require to bring the PITH-heads in, including any specialized tech and weapons that are not common knowledge to the wurld at large, plus the use of any prototype gadgets or gizmo's that could assist us, agreed?"

C.J. chewed his bottom lip thoughtfully, paling further as he scribbled, and I added. "Mew will pay our fee fifty purrcent up-front and the remainder of the balance upon completion within twenty-four hours of receiving our invoice, and any bounty bonus's fur bringing in the PITH alive, agreed?"

I was watching C.J. intently as he chewed the end of his pen thoughtfully and upon hearing this invoice claws he nearly choked on it.  Parsley gave him a firm slap on the back and the pen flew across the room.  Amber picked it up and threw it like a dart, and it landed nib furst in the centre of his notepad, quivering slightly.

"Impurressive!" he murmured and began to scribble his notes again.

"C.J. do we have a deal?" I asked wundering if I'd asked fur too much and then thought, nah, mew can neffur ask fur enough from a government agency.  Then I thought, did I miss something, or is there anything else that I should have added, so I said. "I also want an addendum that if I want to add more to the contract howeffur bizarre it may seem to mew, I can and there will be no penalties fur this."

I knew I was pushing it, but I also knew that C.J. had nowhere else to go other than me.

He took off his flat cap, exhaled loudly and mopped his brow with a blue hanky this time, wiped his paws and re-read his notes.  Aftur a few minutes of silence he addressed us all.

"Basil and The B-Team I have considered your purrposal and terms plus calculated the risks, if mew will read and sign here," he proffered the notepad to me and tapped the bottom of the page. "We have a deal."

I took it and read each and effury wurd to make sure it was exactly as I had said and not a slippery F.I.B. version slash loose translation of my demands, meaning they could renege due to inappropriate phrasing or the like. 

Squirting some of the ink from the pen on my paw, I placed my paw-print on the paper, C.J. did the same and as it dried, he asked.  "Can I get a copy purrlease?" 

Snowie took the new official yet unofficial, make-do fur now contract and scanned a copy to our computer before printing one-off fur C.J. making sure the date and time were on each copy. Plus she took a photo of us together, both holding it just to be double sure, not that we're paranoid or anything.

"I will have to make an official one when I get back to the office, but this will suffice fur now," he said.

I nodded extending my paw, C.J. and I shook on it "Indeed, when do we start?"

At that moment the ambient lighting in the control room changed from its normal serene-blue to a rather disconcerting red glow and effurypurrdy exchanged rather anxious looks as this had neffur happened before.

The early warning air raid siren automatically blared out through the loudspeakers around the entire bunker.

[FYI we modelled the noise on this siren because if anything is going to get your attention it's this]

[Press play fur full effect!]

Our furiendly A.I. [artificial intelligence] system then spoke in her usual grating, metallic voice. "Mewton-Clawson is under attack, we have a missile incoming, evasive action is required immediately. Survival rate is less than five percent if evasive action is not taken within the next four minutes"

"Basil, what the flip is happening?" Humphrey asked.

"Snowie give me intel now, effurypurrdy on comms channel six, I repeat comms channel six. Amber, mew and Humphrey get down to level two and see what weapons we have fur taking out missiles," I said urgently, my cold and calculating cool taking offur automatically. "Smooch get up top now, Posie do your cloud thing and Parsley take C.J. get down to level eight, Horice will take care of him and then meet me and Smooch up top!"

Effurypurrdy scrambled like a well-oiled machine.

Amber and Humphrey launched through the drop chute in the wall, as it was the fastest route to all other levels.

Snowie said. "Basil the missile is two hundred and fifty clicks and counting."

"Keep me posted," I said. "Amber, what's the good news?"

The comms channel crackled and Amber replied. "We are on level two, the computer inventory show's we have an anti-missile gun, which fires armour-piercing 50 cal rounds and is modified fur shells too... Humphrey is in the forklift now!"

"We have less than four minutes to get it up top, armed and ready, get going... tick tock... tick tock!" I said.

"Copy that," Humphrey and Amber said in unison.

"Snowie, stats now."

"Missile is at 200 clicks and closing," she answered. "The drone has been deployed...  mega-zoom activated... on screen in five, four, three, two, one... we have a visual."

I looked at the screen and was horrified to see a missile of unknown origin blazing its way toward us.  I gulped and said. "Amber, Humphrey give me news, stat!"

"The weapon is headed up top on the freight elevator, thirty seconds till garden breach, I repeat thirty seconds till garden breach!" Humphrey answered.

"Smooch, are mew ready fur weapon delivery?"

Smooch answered immediately. "Copy that... ready fur delivery, bunker doors are open!"

"I'm on my way!" I said racing towards the secret entrance behind the summer house.

 I emerged into the garden just as the huge anti-missile gun and shells appeared on the shiny steel platform.

Snowie's voice sounded. "Missile is at one hundred clicks and closing... I repeat one hundred clicks and closing."

I loaded up four shells and said. "Snowie coordinates now... ready Smooch?"

He nodded as Snowie said. "Southwest of your location."

I zeroed in and could see the blazing fire trail hurtling through the sky towards us and screamed, "Smooch on my twelve, fire now, I repeat fire now!"

"Copy that Basil!" Smooch answered as a manic grin engulfed his face and he pivoted the gun around on its axis. "Target acquired, firing now!"  

I heard the trigger click and braced myself.

** And Cut **

It's that time of the post again, when we bet mew've more questions than mew can shake your tail at!

Such as:

OMC How could mew leave us hanging like that and we've got a whole day to wait?!!

But seriously dudes, this no joke, what's going to happen if mew don't stop that missile?

Nice wurk getting C.J. to agree to all your terms, we're mew also a lawyer?

It seems like the PITH-heads have no rules of engagement, how will mew deal with that?

Will Horice really be ok with C.J. invading his private oasis without prior invitation?

What does Posie do in the cloud?

Can we get an air raid siren installed at our house?

etc...

We're sure mew purrobably have many more but to be honest we can't think of any right now as we're under attack... eeeeeek!

Many thanks fur joining us fur our epic re-run of

FAST, FURRY & DANGEROUS

Don't furget to sneak back into the CLASSIFIED FILE ROOM next week fur Part III

Until then

DON'T GO OUT OF THE GARDEN!!!

Epic purrs

Commander Basil 

& 

Click here to go to the next report in Episode 3 

Follow Us @BionicBasil®  at Instacat

**PLEASE NOTE**

Copyright © 2019 by BionicBasil® & Cathrine Garnell  ~ Author & Publisher

All rights reserved. No part of this blog serialized publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including; content scraping, screenshots, blatant copying or any other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the author and publisher. For permission requests, write to the publisher, addressed “Attention: Permissions Coordinator,” at the email address below:

cathrinegarnell @gmail . com

Graphics created with paid licence www.canva.com and www.pizap.com

YouTube air raid video
Bunker Background Images used with paid license from Shutterstock.com